スキップしてメイン コンテンツに移動

Cutting-edge Daily Life of Elderly #5 The Movie “104 Years Old, Tetsuyo Lives Alone”

 “The era of the 100-Year Life” is now becoming a common phrase, especially in Japan, but how many centenarians actually live in the country? The answer is 95,119 as of September 17, 2024*, more than a 620-fold increase in just over 60 years (153 centenarians in 1963). It means that Japanese centenarians can fill two major baseball stadiums.



The other day, I received an invitation to a movie preview. Drawn by the charming smile of the woman printed on the postcard, I decided to go see it. The movie “104 Years Old, Tetsuyo Lives Alone” is a documentary film about Ms. Tetsuyo Ishii. As some of you may know, she has been featured in newspapers and TV programs as a model centenarian; she has even published several books. It’s embarrassing to confess, but I knew nothing about her, so everything I saw in the movie was new to me.

 

Tetsuyo’s house is in a mountainous area surrounded by nature in Onomichi City, Hiroshima. The movie begins with Tetsuyo slowly walking backwardsstep by step, down a slope from her house.

“She worked as an elementary school teacher; after the retirement, she dedicated herself to the community as a welfare commissioner. She has lived alone since age 83, when her husband passed away, helping and laughing together with her niece and neighbors.” The flier introduces the movie like this, but naturally, Tetsuyo’s life has been much more than that.

 

Tetsuyo is filled with cheer throughout the movie, always smiling and thanking. When asked why she is like that, her answer is: “Oh, well… otherwise, I can’t keep going. Complaining would do no good even when I had to deal with hardship. If I can’t solve the problem, I might as well think positively. Some people may think I’m stupid or something, always smiling despite being miserable. But I can’t help it because feeling down would get me nowhere,” as she sits on a levee at a harbor looking out to the sea.

Tetsuyo must have gone through so many hardships and tragedies in these 104 years. As the movie went on, I gradually realized that her cheerfulness has come from the experience of overcoming all these challenges.

 

Tetsuyo became an elementary school teacher in 1941, at age 20, being in charge of first graders. In the very same year, the Pacific War started with the attack on Pearl Harbor. When she arrived at the school in the morning, the vice principle hurriedly announced from the podium: “Attention, everyone! It’s awful, the war has started.” According to Tetsuyo, she kept teaching during the war, determined to end it soon and never to make any of these children go to battlefields. In the movie, Tetsuyo attends a reunion of the school, where over 10 former students gather and welcome her in the school yard. After a few minutes of embracing each other with happy tears, they soon start laughing hard.

“Teacher! It’s me, XX,.” “Oh, you’ve grown up,” “Sure, I’m 88!” “Oh my!!”

“Teacher! I’m YY!” “Hmm, I don’t remember,” “How about me? I’m ZZ,” “Can’t tell.”

She has good reason not to remember their faces: They have changed so much since the last time she saw them over 80 years ago.

The reunion, which takes place in the classroom, starts with a moment of silence for the students who have passed away. Then, Tetsuyo takes attendance with a clear voice. As the event goes on, Tetsuyo gradually traces old memories and shares them with the students: “You used to wet yourself all the time. I remember you washing the underwear. Boys were always the ones to wet themselves.”

 

At age 26, Tetsuyo married her colleague Yoshihide and moved to the current house in Onomichi. Despite being the wife of the oldest son, she was not blessed with children.. She still regrets it to this day and apologizes to her ancestors in her diary, “I’m sorry, I’m sorry….” You can feel her pain just by looking at these letters. Being childless in the time with the slogan “Be fruitful and multiply,” she must have felt ashamed and humiliated beyond our imagination. But still Tetsuyo has maintained the family grave by herself for over 20 years since her husband passed away. Whenever she goes out, she would bend over and pull weed one by one, endlessly, thinking that she must keep the land clean as the ancestors left it for her. Even when she is hospitalized, she dedicates herself to rehabilitation with strong determination to go home, and she indeed comes home.

 

Tetsuyo can do fewer things as she ages from 102, 103, to 104, but she never gives up living at her own home. She does receive support from her niece in the neighborhood, uses home care services, and stays at a care facility for a while when not feeling well. While using these resources, she still values living at home at her own pace. People around her also understand and respect her choice.

The niece lives right in front of her. When Tetsuyo is hospitalized, the niece would open the windows of her aunt’s house to let fresh air in, firmly believing that the aunt will come home. Some neighbors have said why not live together. But according to the niece, if they did, Tetsuyo would pay attention to her needs, and she would be mindful of her aunt, and it would go on and on, and they wouldn’t be able to totally relax. The distance they have now is just about right.

Tetsuyo also says she lives by herself but she is not alone, always expressing her appreciation to people: “I can keep living thanks to everyone’s help. I’m so grateful.”

 

In the scene where her relatives get together, one of them says “I don’t want to live to 100 because I’m scared of having dementia.” Another one then starts saying, “I’m scared of dementia too. I don’t want to be a burden on others.” Tetsuyo laughs them off by saying, “You may say so, but I was 100 before I knew it. You will be 100 too while taking a nap.” Worrying would do no good, so live in the moment: I think that’s what she meant.

 

She may no longer be able to clean or organize her house too well; no problem. She may forget an appointment; so what? Her miso paste may get a little moldy; she doesn’t care. Her kitchen knife may look black with rust; it’s the proof of aging just like herself. Using a gas stove is dangerous? Replace it with the electric one. Isn’t she supposed to throw away the dried sardines after making broth? No, she eats them all because they’re good protein sources. She can’t move as fast because her legs hurt; instead of complaining, she would compliment her legs saying, “Thanks for your hard work for over 100 years.”

 

I’ve been easygoing like this all my life, for over 100 years. Life has allowed me to do so many things, like chatting with friends and picking flowers. It’s nice to be 100 years old enjoying beautiful and pleasant days. I’m grateful for my life. Don’t ever use the past tense. Let’s keep using “ing.”

Tetsuyo keeps going with a smile, gracefully riding her scooter and greeting her neighbors.

 

If you have a chance, please go see her at a movie theater.

Written by Mamiko Kashima


 “104-sai, Tetsuyo-san no hitori gurashi” (104 Years Old, Tetsuyo Lives Alone)

To be released in April 2025 across Japan (e.g., Cine Switch Ginza)

Inquiries: yurisan@eurus.dti.ne.jp; Phone: 090-3335-9582

Narrator: Lily Franky; Director/editor: Kazuhiro Yamamoto

Instagram (in English): https://www.instagram.com/104_hitori/p/DEhSeWjTLiS/

X (in English): https://x.com/104_hitori/status/1876566926400672113 


* A press release by the Ministry of Health, Labour and Welfare (in Japanese):

https://www.mhlw.go.jp/content/12304250/001306744.pdf


コメント

このブログの人気の投稿

Supporting my fav seniors #4 Being Productive Can Take Many Forms

 “My 90-year-old mom lived in a care home, and she was losing strength and energy. So I asked her if there’s anything she’d like to do. What do you think she said?” I was asked this question by Ms. C, the representative of an organization helping people find Ikigai (meaning and purposes of life), who also provided support for her mother.   What came to my mind was the image of my grandfather a few days before he passed away, mumbling “I want to eat eel at the XX restaurant in Nihonbashi.” It turned out that Ms. C also expected a similar response like “I want to eat my favorite XX.”   “But I was wrong. She quietly said, ‘I want to work’.” Ms. C told me that such conversations with her mother had led her to develop a place for people to stay productive as they age. I nodded in total agreement, but…   This conversation also reminded me of the words by a participant in an Ikigai class I taught; it was a woman in her late 70s. She whispered to me: “Wel...

推し活とプロダクティブ#5     一年の「コドク」とプロダクティブ

「わたしね、この時期があまり好きじゃないの、だって一年で 1 番コドクを感じるから」 毎年、年末に近づくと思い出すのがこの言葉。   言葉の主は、リーダーとまではいかないけれど、体操グループでいつも楽しそうな雰囲気で場を盛り上げる M さん。 10 年以上前にご主人を看取り、今は、体操グループ以外にも色々な活動に参加するアクティブな 80 代。   お子さんの話はあまり聴いたことがないのだけれど、遠くに住んでいるのか、すれ違いがあるのか、あまり行き来はない様子。 それを補うわけではないけれど、「日常で頼れるのは近くの仲間」というのが一人暮らしを続けるための M さんの持論。   ゆるやかに多様な 100 のつながりを自分の周りにつくることが大事。 誰かの 100 のつながりの百分の一になることも大事という百人力の研究をしているワタシにとって M さんはお手本の様な人なのだけど … 。   そんな M さんの口から一年のコドクの話をうかがった時には、正直なところ、かなりビックリした。 いつも居場所になっているコミュニティスペースはお休み、仲間もそれぞれのお家の行事で忙しくて誘いづらい、というのがコドクの原因。   街を歩けばクリスマスやお正月ムード、テレビを観れば里帰りに新幹線を待つ家族の楽しそうなインタビュー。 せめてもとおせちの黒豆を煮たのだけど、食べているうちに、あっ、私、一人なんだ … と悲しくなった … とポツリ。   確かに、地域のサロンなどをやっている人も子ども家族が来たりで、年末年始はほとんどの場が活動をお休みするわけで。 遠慮と、ひとりぼっちを知られたくないという多少の見栄もあって、仲間への電話も LINE も控えてしまったり。   そんな M さんのお話から考えはじめたのが、楽しいはずの年末年始に毎年のように襲ってくるコドクの和らげ方。 だって、日本もこれだけひとり暮らしが増えていて、誰もが直面する可能性のある課題だから。   たかだか 1 〜2週間の話だけれど、老いを感じることが増える毎日のなかで、毎年のように繰り返される負の影響はかなりなもの。 多分、ひとりでずっと生き...

推し活とプロダクティブ#4           プロダクティブは「多様」

「施設に入っていた 90 歳の母、身体も弱ってきて、元気もなくなっていたのね。なにかしたいことあるって聞いたら、なんて答えたと思う?」 こんな問いをしてきたのは、生きがいづくりを応援する活動団体の代表でもあり、ご自身のお母様をサポートする C さん。   私の頭に浮かんだのは、「日本橋〇〇のうなぎが食べたい」と亡くなる数日前に呟いた祖父の姿。 C さんも同じだったようで、「大好物の ◾️◾️ が食べたい」なんて答えが返ってくると思っていらしたとのこと。   「でもね、違ったの。働きたいって、ポツリと呟いたの」 そんなお母様とのやり取りから、 C さんは、歳を重ねても可能な限り長くプロダクティブでいられる場づくりに取り組むようなったとのお話をうかがい、大いに頷いた私だったのですが … 。   ふと、思い出したのが、生きがいづくりの講座で講演した際に聴こえてきた受講者からの言葉。 「ねえ、イキイキしないとダメなの?そう言われると、なんだか辛い … 」と小さな声で私に呟いたのは 70 代後半の女性。   その瞬間に感じたのは、無意識に生きづらさを生み出してしまった自分の配慮のなさ。 プロダクティブや生きがいは、仕事して働き続けることやスーパーボランティアや地域のリーダーになることだけではないはずなのに … 。   その女性には、自分の楽しいことや好きなことを周りに少しシェアする位でよくて、イキイキの姿は人それぞれでよいことをご説明させて頂き、笑顔で帰っていただのだけれど … 。 それ以来、気をつけすぎる位に丁寧にお伝えしているのは、プロダクティブのあり方は多様で、そこに優劣はないということ。   今考えると、最期を迎える前の祖父も、鰻が食べたかったのではなく、多分、孫や子どもを自分の贔屓の店に連れて行って喜ばせたかったのかもしれない 大事な誰かに好きをシェアしたい、そんな祖父の想いが詰まった言葉が、「日本橋の〇〇のうなぎが食べたい」だったのかな … 。   今なら少しわかる、祖父の気持ち。 あの時に理解できていたら、もう少し違う会話ができたのかな … と、 30 年前を振り返る毎日です。     -...