スキップしてメイン コンテンツに移動

Supporting my fav seniors #13 A secret crush and productivity

“My son got me a ticket for a professional baseball game and drove me to the stadium.”

“Wow, lucky you! What a sweet son you have——the ticket,  ride and everything.”

 

The conversation took place at a community gathering place used by local residents in their 70s to 90s.

The place was filled with excitement. As Ms. A, in her 70s and living alone, shared her story about the baseball game, Ms. B in her 80s envied Ms. A for having a devoted son, and Ms. C in her 90s praised Ms. A for having energy to go to a bustling stadium.

 

Then, Ms. A started blushing and quietly shared something else:

“You know, I’ve got someone at the Hiroshima Carp baseball team…My heart starts beating fast just thinking about what if our eyes met!”

 

These mature ladies in the conversation went silent, having no idea what Ms. A was talking about.

“You know, he’s so handsome. I know I’m fooling myself, but I can’t stop thinking that the player C heard me cheering and was smiling back at me.”

 

Ms. A’s secret crush on the handsome player stunned everyone in the conversation.

Ms. A explained with a smile that her husband, who had passed away several years before, should forgive her crush because she would greet him every morning at the family altar.

 




Looking back on my own school days, I also had a favorite young star, fantasizing myself bumping into him on the street.

I knew it would never happen, but supporting him was really fun in itself, giving me energy to dress up and to study.

 

In my adult life, however, I don’t recall any such fantasizing because I’ve been too busy and frustrated every day.

As I reflected on my own life, I realized something while watching Ms. A.

 

Ms. A must also feel sad, worried, and frustrated about many things, such as the loss of her husband and other loved ones, as well as her own health problems.

But she looks energetic and keeps on shining. Is that because she has someone to cherish and supports that person, which enables her to cherish herself as well?

 

“Oshikatsu,” meaning “supporting your favorite” in Japanese, is productive because you are giving your energy to someone else. 

That was how I came up with the title of my blogs. Lately, I have started thinking again that it would be even better if Oshikatsu was for someone you secretly love.

 

At age 50, I’m about half way through my life. The first step I can take now may be to find someone I can have a little crush on.

Maybe someone nobody knows, still growing to become big…


 Shino Sawaoka

Associate Professor,

Dept. of Health Management,

Tokai University 

jzt1864@tokai.ac.jp

https://www.tokai-kenko.ac/


コメント

このブログの人気の投稿

Cutting-edge Daily Life of Elderly #8 "Longevity Savings"

  The other day, I was shocked to find a name in the obituary posted on the community bulletin board: It was a former classmate of mine in junior high school. It’s got to be some kind of mistake. To double-check, I hurriedly contacted a friend of mine who had gone to the same high school as him. It really was him, the president of the student association back then. He had died of illness. I hadn’t seen him for over 40 years since graduation, and we weren’t particularly close friends. But I can still remember him, a nice guy always with a smile on his face. This experience has made me realize, well, I’m old enough to experience death of my classmates.   In an episode of a TV drama now on air, the main character’s mother was doing “Nagaiki Chokin,” or longevity savings. The mother was a big fan of Rokusuke Ei, a popular actor and writer who had suggested in one of his books that older people could pool money and save it together. Inspired by this idea, the mother did j...

Let’s Think About Life with Dementia #3  “I live alone, but I’m not alone”―A Critical Role of Visiting Nurses

  Many older people like to continue their own way of living even when they live alone with dementia. The key to making it happen, I have always felt, is how supporters can value these older people’s wisdom, which they have built over the years, and their wishes to remain who they are. In March 2025, the Tokyo Metropolitan Geriatric Medical Center published the guidebook titled “Supporting Independence of Older People Living Alone with Dementia: Practice Guide fo r Visiting Nurses.” This guidebook provides a useful checklist and practical tips for visiting nurses who support older people living alone with dementia. I had an opportunity to be part of this research as a committee member.   The checklist was developed based on detailed interviews with visiting nurses, who had extensive experience in supporting older people living alone with dementia, as well as opinions of experts in this area. It summarizes attitudes, perspectives, and support methods emphasized on the front...

Cutting-edge Daily Life of Elderly #10 Finding Fireflies… and Passion

Many younger seniors stay active by playing various roles. But as they grow older, they tend to gradually stop engaging in activities. According to a survey by the Cabinet Office, the most common reason for not wanting to participate in social activities among men aged 80+ was “I’m not confident in my health and stamina” (45.5%), followed by “I have no friends to participate with” (22.7%) and “I find socializing tiring” (19.7%) * . As a person and his friends grow older, they may be losing confidence, facing the fact that they can no longer move around as they used to, both physically and mentally.   My father used to keep himself busy even after retirement, serving as president of a facility for people with disabilities, local welfare commissioner, officer of the neighborhood association and a senior citizens club, and many more. He had also traveled several times a year, such as shareholders’ trips and visits to a friend in a different prefecture. But since my mother st...