As a gerontologist, studying how we can enrich our lives as we age, I have had many opportunities to take a brief look at the lives of seniors.
Their diversity is enormous, way beyond the
theories I’ve studied in gerontology.
One of these seniors is Ms. A, whom I met
at an exercise group. Her life looks like a model example of productive aging.
She is over 90 years old and has difficulty walking, but she lives by herself,
surrounded by people who continue to count on her.
Meanwhile, Mr. B, a gentleman in his 60s
whom I first met at a park bench, is a former manager at a major company. Mr. B
often sighs, saying that time passes too slowly as he rarely leaves his house
since the retirement.
Looking back on my early days as a
researcher, I tended to be drawn to people who keep shining, like Ms. A.
But the more people I met, the more I’ve
become interested in the idea of “their own way,” focusing on each person’s uniqueness.
Let’s take Mr. B and “his own way” for
example…
I just made an assumption that he stayed at
home all the time, looking back at the past over and over. But is it really
true? Is that all he got in his life?
Looking more closely, I’ve found that he
takes a walk in the neighborhood every morning and evening, rain or shine, to
achieve his goal of walking 8,000 steps a day.
He also brings tongs and a plastic bag when
taking a walk, to pick up trash along the way.
Twice a week, he goes to a mini-supermarket
to buy the sweets he loves, though the doctor told him to avoid them, and keeps
it a secret from his wife.
He always goes to the store around when
local elementary school students go home, watching children at the crosswalk to
make sure they’re safe though nobody has asked him to do it.
What’s interesting about Mr. B is that
despite all these contributions to the community, such as cleaning up the street and ensuring kids’
safety, he wants no one to recognize these.
When I couldn’t help but praising him, Mr.
B replied rather angrily: “I feel disgusted when hearing those words. I do it
for my health, and I just can’t help noticing things. Aren’t these reasons good
enough?”
Maybe, just maybe, he was enjoying the time
passing slowly, looking back on the days with piles of work.
And maybe, now, his own way of being
productive is to do something small for someone, something only he can see,
such as picking up trash and watching over kids.
He had to spent 30 or 40 years according to
the criteria set by someone else. And now, finally, he can be the center of his
own life and set his own standards.
What is “your own way”? The question is
deep, making me think every day^_^
Shino Sawaoka
Associate Professor,
Dept. of Health Management,
Tokai University
jzt1864@tokai.ac.jp

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